It’s hard to imagine that your pain can result in any sort of good, especially when you’re in the midst of it. It can be even harder to make yourself vulnerable enough for that pain to be used by God for His purposes. When we’re in the trenches of life…divorce, death, loneliness, poverty, depression and on and on the list goes…it can be all too easy to resent even the idea of God using our perceived misfortunes for any purpose.
But what if I told you that your suffering may actually be a blessing?
What if I told you that your pain may be the thing that brings you closer to your heavenly Father? The thing that refines your soul. The thing that draws out compassion or patience or resilience or perspective.
Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.
James 1:2-4
And then what if I told you that your pain, if embraced as something God can use for good in your own life, could then be used to be a source of blessing for others? A means of offering support and encouragement to others going through something similar. A means of offering hope and meaning to those who haven’t yet learned to embrace their pain as a gift. A way to help others feel less alone in their struggles.
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christs’ sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too.
2 Corinthians 1:3-5
As of the date I write this, I have been a single mom for approximately nine years. I am a single mom to five children, and their father is almost completely out of the picture, living on the other end of the country. There is no co-parenting happening over here, so when I say I am a single parent, doing it alone, I mean I am doing it alone. And while the struggle has gotten easier with each passing year, it is still a struggle which deserves it’s own post.
But what is absolutely astounding to me is the overwhelming feeling of God’s sustaining grace in my life. I am lonely beyond belief, but I don’t feel alone. I am so physically tired each and every day, yet I know God’s strength is abundant and will continue to see me through. I feel helpless in my own power, yet confident in the One who holds my life in His hands. I feel undeserving of the beautiful souls God has put in my care as their mother. God’s grace is everywhere I look in my life.
I didn’t always have this perspective, though. I used to wallow in self-pity, wondering how God could do this to me. Wasn’t I deserving of a godly, loving, faithful husband like other women I see in church? Wasn’t I deserving of a second chance like other divorced women? What did I do to deserve such a lonely, difficult path raising five children alone? But then God shook me up. He opened my eyes to see that while my life had become messy and difficult, He had the power to transform it into something beautiful! But I had to be willing to open up my heart to Him. I had to invite Him in and submit to what He was doing. I had to receive every trial as a gift from Him because, if I let Him, He would turn it into something beautiful. He would make beauty from the ashes of my broken life.
And He did….
He made beauty from ashes.
My life is still difficult and lonely. But my heart is full and my children are happy and thriving.
I have been asked to lead a breakout session for single moms at a parenting seminar at my church. I’ve never done anything like this before, and every time I think of it, tears flood my eyes thinking of the goodness of God to bring from the place I was to the place I am now. God’s peace and power have so permeated my life and the lives of my children that leadership in my church sees the opportunity for that hope to be passed on to others in a similar situation. I don’t feel an ounce of pride in it. I feel humbled and so unworthy. Because I am. But God, in all His loving goodness, transformed my heart, and now I get to be a vessel for Him to use my pain for His glory.
So, here’s my challenge to you…
Open up your heart and ask God to use your pain. It’ll be worth it. Trust me.
